Thursday, December 1, 2011

December. It's Now.

It's December now.

Now it's December.

It's now December.

Those versions, and more, keep playing in my head, occasionally punctuated by a "Wow!" or an "I can't believe it. Is it really ...?"

Have I survived?

No. I have not survived. Just another couple of weeks, and I will have survived.

30+ hours a week as a technical writer. 40+ hours a week as an "adjunct" instructor--teaching part-time, yes, but grading is a full-time job itself when you teach writing.

In the in-between times, I played Mommy to my rapidly growing toddler. I've missed her more times than I want to think about. In fact, next to sleep, I think Anne is what I've missed most of all for these past few months.

What else have I missed? Oh, random things. Exercise. Eating. Writing. Reading. Piano. Hiking. All those things I used to do and haven't done much of for six months.

Oh, and I missed my husband, too. That guy who lives in my house. The one who's made quite a few dinners and given Anne quite a few baths while I've worked late at my tech writing job, graded papers, or (on the very rare occasion) come home and passed out from exhaustion at 7:30 p.m.

I haven't missed housekeeping. It's missed me, though.

I am ready for this phase of my life to end. This phase, which started last May and really cranked up in mid-August, has been pretty demanding. Add to that a few bouts with the crud, childcare woes, a sick and dying (now dead) cat, the usual money concerns, and a few students occasionally taking their frustrations out on their English instructor ... and you have a pretty stressful few months.

But I've handled it relatively well. Sure, I'm 10 pounds lighter because I never had time to eat, but that's not a bad thing. For the first time in my life, I'm looking in the mirror and thinking, "Wow. I could really stand to gain a few pounds."

When I was 15, I would fantasize about being able to think such things. So I'm not going to complain about it now.

I've fallen behind in everything in life--fallen out of touch with friends and family, and I haven't completed a single book this year. (Reading, I mean--though I haven't written any books, either, come to think of it.)

I think is the first year of my life in which I haven't completed a single book.

That will change.

I'm signed up to teach a few classes in the spring, but I've made a big life-change in that I'll no longer be working at the tech-writing job. Yeah.

It'll be just school and Anne and Dan and reading and writing, and maybe the occasional piano lesson, and a good run or hike every few days.

So life should quiet down. I hope. I really need it to quiet down.

I'm ready to move on to this next phase. I think Miss Anne is ready, too. And Dan. And George the piano.

We're all ready.

Who knows, maybe I'll even start blogging regularly again. (Probably not, but one can dream.)


lifeinlimits said...

So glad to hear that you'll be able to focus on teaching and family next year . . . YAY! I hope that makes things easier for you, time-wise. And I love the above post on Anne! Can't believe our little ones are two-year-olds this month! AHH! It is such a fun age.... :) Happy early birthday to Annie :) and praying for your stamina during the next couple of weeks!

Anya said...

I still faithfully read your blog, Waterfall... and I was so happy to read about the exciting changes coming up for you!
God bless you and yours!

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