DIY Mad Gab: Introduction. And Maybe Marshmallow.

As a hard-of-hearing person, I really like the game "Mad Gab." The whole idea is to hear something that sounds kind of like a common phrase, and then try to figure out what the common phrase actually is. For example, you might have to figure out that "Cohen Peas" is "Go in peace."

I've only played this game once, but I loved it because I got to see everyone else struggle to do the very thing I have to do all the time, every day: hear nonsense, and then reconstruct it to make some semblance of sense. An added perk was that I won the game easily because, people, I am good at this!

Now that I'm working remotely, I have a lot of conference calls and other phone calls. I generally try to get the people on the other end of the meeting to let me see them via the Zoom camera feature, but that doesn't always happen for a variety of reasons. The result is a rollickingly fun list of what I'm calling "DIY Mad Gab" phrases. Here's what I heard at a meeting earlier today. I've added punctuation because, well, I think it's funnier that way:

• Strategically as central as their enema resources
• Pleasure at times, but they don’t hide it for thousand dollars!
• Every cancellation is a turnaround at the seaport.
• Maybe marshmallow you guys?
• Freedom nuke givers are a treasure to your cause!
• We’re not engaging enema companies.
• Stop-starter back there, you’re money-driven!
• The nano man project, adieu!
• I fling that hard in that papoose!
• Oh wow! I was a cur and built for me!
• Let me see if I can springform an idea ...
• They’re doing what I kinda hetchin’ every day.
• It’s a way to kinda damn-damn ‘em.
• The deep take it well, it’s very offensive, and we can help.
• I never got Alton Brown.
• I’m immediately struggling to make my face.
• Those cheese help a lot.
• Stinkle sigh ...

The only problem with this game is that there is no cheat sheet, no answer on the back of the card. It's either ask people to repeat themselves every other sentence, or sit there and struggle to understand.

Actually, there is a third option: Stop struggling and just type exactly what you hear. Because some of it is seriously funny. And this is not a "I'm laughing so I don't cry thing." At least not completely.

So, friends, I may be posting more DIY Mad Gab posts soon. Hope you enjoy!