Reasonable?

My New Year's resolution this year was a little different from that of previous years. Of course I want to get into better shape, read more, write more, hike more, be a better wife and mom, etc. But this year I've decided that it's time for me to get back in touch with my musical self. I forget that I'm musical. I really do. I think, "I'm just a normal person who likes music." But the truth is, I have some natural talent. And I love to make music. I can't help but think that it's wrong somehow for me not to be involved with music in some way.

In my efforts to rediscover my musical soul in 2017, I'm taking some steps I've never taken before. I'm studying with two music teachers, 30 minutes a week (for a total of an hour a week) ... and neither of them are piano teachers. I'm expanding my horizons this year. I still love piano and play it every day, but I'm exploring other areas of music that, until recently, I've never explored.

I started taking voice lessons a month or so ago. I was delighted to learn that I can carry a tune. I always sounded okay to myself, but I figured my singing was cringe-inducing to anyone who listened. (Of course, no one ever listened, because I've rarely sung in front of another person, even in the car.) I have zero confidence in my voice, and that makes it worse--even if I sound good, I sing in barely more than a whisper. It's awful because I love to sing ... in the car, alone, where no one will roll their eyes or grimace.

I also met with a guitar teacher yesterday, seeing as I have a brand-new acoustic guitar, a Christmas present from Dan. I was more nervous about the first guitar lesson than I was about the first voice lesson, oddly enough. It went well--I think the teacher and I are going to get along well. He's a Bach nerd, too, and I learned quite a bit in just that first trial lesson.

I've titled this post "Reasonable?" because I don't know how reasonable it is for a mom who works full-time and is a Girl Scout leader (Girl Scouts requires at least two hours of volunteer work per week, and usually more) to take on lessons in both voice and guitar. Financially, it's about $200 a month, and money is tight. Time-wise, it's an hour of lessons, plus 40 to 60 minutes a day of practice. That's a lot of time. Do I have that kind of time? Will I burn out before spring gets here?

I didn't mention piano, but I want to keep playing piano for a steady 30 minutes a day. So that's another three or four hours a week of music.

I think of a couple of semesters where I've taking writing classes with the Great Smokies Writing Program. Those classes were two or three hours long--much more per week than I'll spend in music lessons--and I typically put in at least an 40-60 minutes a day of work, on average. So I don't think this will be all that different, at least as a time commitment.

Of course, I still need to write, even if I'm not pressuring myself to work on a major project.

But regarding music, there is the big question: Why study voice? Why study guitar?

I'm still trying to figure that out, and I'll write more on that later. My immediate, gut answer is that "I want to sing and play guitar with the same confidence and ease that I feel when I play the piano." (That might be a tall order, since I've played the piano for more than 40 years.) Another is, "I just want to make music, and I'm tired of piano being my only means of doing that well."

THose are the gut answers. I'll explore this question a little more later ... when I have time.

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