Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Multitude Monday #12 ... On a Tuesday

Yesterday morning, Dan went with me to the courthouse.

Yes, quite the Valentine's Day gift. Good thing we're not big on that holiday.

But I needed his presence there more than I needed flowers or candy. (Definitely more than I needed candy.)

Yesterday, we watched as Mary's killer pleaded guilty for taking Mary's life on March 31, 2009, when he hit her head-on. He was in a truck, she in a sports car. His blood-alcohol level was through the roof. She was on her way home from a wake.

Every time the judge said "March 31, 2009," my chest tightened a little. How I wish I could rewind time to the day before and plan things differently. Do things differently.

I wanted to throw up when the sheriff's deputy who'd been first to the scene described what he'd found. The deputy himself, a seventeen-year veteran of law enforcement, looked pretty sick himself. "It was some of the worst I've seen in 17 years," he told the judge.

Mary's killer was sentenced as expected. The laws of the state don't allow more than 38 months in jail. That doesn't seem enough for snuffing out a young woman's life, does it. But he is behind bars now, and I hope that, now that this day is behind us, Mary's family can get some degree of closure. Whatever that means.

That morning of tears and reliving the ugly past came on the heels of what was probably the most joy-filled weekend of my life since becoming a mom. So I'm feeling a weird mix of loss and gratitude.

A weird mix of loss and gratitude. That's pretty much what I've felt regarding Mary, ever since March 31, 2009.

Thankful thoughts for this week:

191. that we can grieve together

192. that, on Mary's last day alive, I got to spend more time with her than I ever had in our young friendship

193. that there is always work do, people to care for, life to tend to

194. that, as far as we know, Mary didn't suffer

195. mild February days that Mary would have loved--pale sky, wispy clouds, with just a hint of a breeze ... perfect for hiking

196. a two-day weekend, after almost five long months of six-day work weeks

197. family time: Dan, Anne, and me, just being together (Do other families really do this on a regular basis? It's hard to imagine.)

198. crying out "Weeeeeee!" with my daughter as we go back and forth on the swing


199. a little girl riding high on her daddy's shoulders


200. feeling, at a moment, that I am as happy as I've ever been

201. little leather shoes that fit her just right

202. receiving my first-ever kiss from my daughter

203. "yes" answers to prayer (there are the "no" and the "later" answers, which I am also thankful for ... but it's nice to get a "yes" every now and then)

204. front porches

205. a new, Daddy-built bookcase, and


206. lots of books to fill it, and

207. room for more books

208. when opportunity knocks again. persistently. daring me to ignore it.

209. justice - that it is real, and the need for it is wired into our brains

210. mercy - that God forgives

Have a good week, everyone. To read more bloggers' thankful thoughts (or link your own), just click the banner below.

holy experience

2 comments:

  1. I too was at the courthouse for the Couey family, for Mary, and for myself. I was one of Mary's friends. I don't think I met you there, but thanks for coming out to support them, and her.
    -John Lattier

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  2. Nina, I haven't read the two newspaper articles about the "non-trial" day we had. I just looked for your blog and found a new one!

    Thank you both for coming. I wish it hadn't been so hectic and we could have spend some time together talking. But I'm thankful his lawyer didn't take Mary's name in vain like they said he would have. I will get to Franklin again one day to see everyone. Until then, I'll keep in touch.

    Happy hiking, and keep Mary with you.
    love rose

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