How I'm Really Feeling

I hate not having the Hubster around. I have so many things to get done, and I'm so tired from having to do everything myself. It was one thing before I married Hubster and lived in a smaller house and had fewer responsibilities. I didn't have more than I could handle. But now, with Hubster gone, I'm having to deal with all my stuff and all his stuff and selling this stupid house ... and I'm really annoyed because everyone says things like "Oh, the house looks lovely!" (it is an eyesore), and "You know, you are so strong" (even though they're witness to the fact that this responsible and mature 38-year-old can, and will, and will again, throw a tantrum like it's nobody's business).

I need to clean my roof, fix the gutters, cut down some trees, repair (or replace) the fence for good, pressure-wash the parking area and deck, treat the deck, etc.--all stuff the Hubster has been saying he would do for the past year, but never got around to doing. And now people are not even considering our house and I think its rotten curb appeal is a big reason. And I don't have the physical strength to do half of this stuff.

I had to fix closet doors this morning. I don't even know how to fix closet doors. I don't know how I fixed them. But I jiggled them a bit, cursed and tantrumed when they fell out of their grooves, somehow managed to replace them without splintering or otherwise hurting myself, and ... voila ... I could open them again. So, they're fixed.

I'm in a really bad mood. Hubster just called. Talk about bad timing. I love him more than anything, but I really am not in the mood to talk to him and hear about his wonderful hike and the beautiful views and all the fun he's having right now.


Stacey said…
I hear ya, cuz... When Drew was in Boston, he texted me a picture of the restaurant he was eating at with the caption "We're dining al fresco - delicious salmon."

After Ace had just had his 4th MAJOR tantrum of the night and I was having fish sticks and mac and cheese, this was just the text I DIDN'T want to receive.

violet said…
Oh Waterfall, this post puts me back in the space a year ago when we had just put our house on the market and suddenly saw it through buyer's eyes. It was a stressful time (even more so when you've 'bought' your new house before the old one sold - and we vowed we wouldn't do that but we did anyway).

It all worked out though, and your situation will too.

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